lozer_g33k

If I could create my own mauvie...it'd be about something I know...Like mental illness such as schizophrenia or something along those lines. Also, it'd be about death and drug-addictions. It'd be a docudrama, and it'd end mysteriously...sad, yet hopeful...I can't really explaining it. Actually...I've been branistorming about a book of the sort for a while!! ^_^

          Anger Kills

                   Days were the longest when you were gone. Tears flowed and songs played, and I'd gasp for air as if being choked. I couldn't take your anger anymore, but I couldn't take not being there with you, either. I was stuck in the middle, and there was only one way I could handle the situation.

   So now, with all of these memories playing like a movie in my mind, the only scenes with colour are starring you. Your face flashes across the screen, your words deafen my thoughts. I was always stuck in the middle. Always searching for a way out, a way to make the longest days shorter and the shortest days disappear, and to take the pain out of the agony.

   The stereo played loudly, but I wasn't listening. I treated it like everyone treated me: I'm was there, making noise, praying to be noticed, but remaining unheard. Instead of listening to the music, I listened to the trigger, that beautiful silver piece of metal, shining in the night-time sun. I touched it, smoothing my fingers over its intricate detail and deadly design.

     I had to work up enough nerve to do this, but I needed to. It was my desire, my love, my one true obsession. Death comes to no one easily, and I figure this was just one of those obstacles I'd have to win to get what I truly want. I held the gun, now, in correct position, still looking it over. I placed it in my mouth, feeling the cool steel tickle my tongue and throat. "I love you," I recited, "but you just don't love me." Though no one would ever know nor hear my confession, my plea, I felt it necessary.  When you walked in the door, I ended all of my confusion and all of my pain. The hurt had finally ended...all of my suffering was finally over.

    You're angry at me for killing myself. I'm angry at you for letting me do it.

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If you have any suggestions/comments..feel free to tell me! I <3 critz!!